Sunday, March 3, 2013

Full of Excuses

It is hard to believe that today begins the fifth week of my investment in me. So that means for four weeks, I have been working hard. It has been fun, awakening and exhausting. For the most part, I think I have done well. I diligently worked out at least five times a week, and tried to motivate other people along the way. But food....Ha! Food is an entirely different story. Life became more complicated around the time I began this journey! So began the excuses.

Around the time I started with my trainer, my husband finally got a new job. We were so excited; It was a LOOONNNGG three months of him warming his recliner. But the timing couldn't have been worse. He officially started in the middle of the month when they sent him off to the cold tundra of Illinois.....(I know, I know, in comparison to some places, it's not that bad. And he is a Yankee. But, he's been in Bama for six years, so to him, it was like going to Antarctica).......He has been in training for the past two weeks and won't be home until the end of the week. During this time, I had a calendar full of responsibilities above and beyond my normal duties. So for the last two long weeks I have been mommy, daddy, housewife, sales person, president of something, meeting organizer, problem solver, fixer of broken things, bill payer, student, master procrastinator and major slacker but expert excuse maker.

I had a plan. If you have been reading my blog for any amount of time, you know I had a plan. And you know how well I stick to my plans. At least that is consistent. I didn't stick to my plan. Instead, I overwhelmed myself with a gazillion things I had to do, none of which included a healthy meal plan. And oh, did I tell you I gave up meat for 40 days during this time too? Yah. I know, I'm a genius. My diet has looked like this.

Breakfast- whatever I can grab that doesn't have meat.
Lunch- Shit, I forgot.
Dinner- Too tired to even think about it so whatever the kids talk me into.

My calorie intake was no where near what it should be. My nutrition level....well, there pretty much was no nutrition. When I finally did eat, it wasn't pretty y'all. And I just chalked it up to being busy. Even my trainer didn't hound me about it. My weight loss buddies all understood. "You're so busy" "You're doing a great job." "Don't be so hard on yourself." "It's so hard." But really, it is not. I just made excuses. "I can't do this because I'm too tired." "I can't do that because I don't have time." I can't, I can't I can't. So the results? Well, by the Grace of God, I didn't gain. In fact, as of today I've lost 6-8 lbs depending on the scale I stand on. I even went down a pants size. But, I've been working out five times a week for four weeks. Surely I could have had better results if I just put a little effort into it. And while I feel better physically, my energy levels have not been where they should be for the amount of work I've been doing. Anything I lost was truly a fluke. I'm grateful I didn't gain! And it certainly isn't going to last if I don't get my shit together!

So I'm done making excuses. I'm investing way to much into this journey. And I want to rock an adorable polka dot dress and some red high heals in London, darn it! And that is just over a month away. Boy, life doesn't seem to be slowing down to wait on me to get my ducks in a row. Kenny is gone for one more week, then I go to Orlando, then he goes to Honduras, then the kids and I will go on spring break, then it's London time. But, no more excuses. I've got to do this, and do it right. I am determined to make this the last year of really good ideas that I don't follow through on. I will lose this weight once and for all. I will live up to being Fabulous at (or in my) Thirties. I am worth it. My kids are worth it. The people that I will inspire along the way are worth it. It's time to make this happen for real.

And of course I have a plan. Well, not really. Kind of. Maybe. Alright, not exactly. I have a plan to try my hardest to make the best choices with what I've got. If that means I have to spend a little more money to make healthy choices more manageable, then so be it. If it means I need to cancel some of my agenda to prioritize a healthier lifestyle for myself and my kids, then that is what I'm going to do. I doubt the people I swear are counting on me will be upset. They'll probably be relieved! I've been told I exhaust people with the schedule I keep. I'm not going to pen my plan on paper. I'm going to wing it, but with much gusto. And when I report back in another month, I hope that my new pants are falling down and I won't fit into that fabulous dress.....I will have to buy a smaller one!

That's all for now. Final thoughts? Don't make excuses. Find a way.  You are worth it!

~Mommylah~

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